My old and dirty stove/oven.

    Sure, some of you are using hotplates, toaster ovens, and bonefires to heat your food; The majority, however, are using a combination stove/oven to cook (or at least you would be if microwave ovens hadn't been invented)! The "stove top" is where the multiple "burners" are. They can be used to boil water for tea, heat canned soup, and create small grease fires. The big opening thing is the "oven" part of the device. We recommend that you DO NOT crawl inside and close the door to get warm, as such actions may cause sponateous combustion for reasons scientists do not currently understand.

    It is a little known fact that one of Destro's earliest jobs was selling ovens at a local appliance store. Though most customers were scared by his unorthadox methods, Cobra Commander was spellbound by Destro's "Incinerating Oven of Death" sales speech. COBRA purchased 10, and though numerous attempts to lure the Joes into the ovens failed, they proved to be one of the terrorist group's most destructive weapons when, launched from catapults, they broke a dozens of windows at a military base and knocked Snake-Eyes unconscious.

Where to buy:

Sears.com has a few ovens, but I have to warn you: in my opinion, buying ovens on-line is a BAD IDEA. Go to your local appliance shop (like Sears or Best Buy) and LOOK CAREFULLY at the various models. Have them bring the oven in and install it instead of saving $50.00 and doing it yourself. It is NOT worth the hassle, folks! Especially if you're buying a gas oven, HAVE A PROFESSIONAL INSTALL IT. I've lost too many friends to such accidents, and I don't want you, my beloved readers, to suffer the same fate.